NFL Picks: Week 16

Time to start engraving Joe's name on the 2011 FCF NFL Picks trophy. (Figgs' note: I think we could have done that after Week 3. Also want to point out that this is two weeks in a row that I've come out on top, would have been three if I made my actual picks instead of Costanza-ing it in Week 13.)

Last Week
Figgs: 9-6-1
Joe: 8-7-1
Nick: 6-9-1

Figgs' $ Picks: 3-3
Nick's $ Picks: 2-4

Current Standings
Joe: 119-95-9
Nick: 106-108-9
Figgs: 101-113-9

Figgs' $ Picks: 19-22-1
Nick's $ Picks: 35-27-5


Thursday Night Football

COLTS (+6) vs Texans
Figgs: Texans. No way Indy does it two weeks in a row.
Joe: Colts; I smell a winning streak coming. They might just win their way out of the Andrew Luck sweepstakes. If healthy, I could have seen Houston make a Super Bowl run. Now, however, they should be the easiest 1st round home playoff out since the 2010 Seahawks. (Of course said Seahawks actually won that playoff game last year, once again proving how little all of us actually know about sports, despite what we may think).
Nick: Texans. Just can't see Indy winning two in a row.


Saturday, 1 pm kickoff

RAVENS (-13) vs Browns
Figgs: BROWNS. You would think Andy would know by now that I like my Browns pick to be in all caps, yet each week I have to change it. To Joe's point, I will never be unhappy with a Browns W, especially over these bitches.
Joe: Ravens; I'm glad I work Saturday and have to miss my 1st Browns game in years, because if we actually pull off this upset, I would never be madder in a Browns win. It would simultaneously screw up our draft pick, AND hand the Steelers the division title.
Nick: Ravens. This is the rare case when it's definitely better for the Browns to lose, for the reasons Joe outlined. Rooting for a win this week is short-sighted, and I just don't see the Browns scoring enough to hang in this one.

CHIEVES (-1) vs Raiders
Figgs: Raiders. Oakland still fighting for something, and as Joe said I think KC is spent after last week.
Joe:Raiders; Classic letdown game for the fighting Romeos after blowing their load against the Pack.
Nick: Chiefs. Can't wait to laugh at you guys over this one. The Raiders are lousy and KC played a great game last week. Arrowhead remains one of the toughest places to play in the league, and the Chiefs can still win the West with some help. These guys clearly like playing for Romeo Crennel and Tamba Hali has established himself as a top-5 pass rusher. ($ -2.5)

TITANS (-7.5) vs Jags
Figgs: Jax. I watched the Jags on Thursday night last week, and boy did they look awful. Then again, Tennessee didn't look so good getting Cam'ed all over last week either, so I'll take the touchdown +.
Joe: Titans; If Locker starts, I'll feel comfortable with this pick. Even if he doesn't, Jacksonville might have the worst group of skilled position players outside of MJD in NFL history, so I will still like this pick.
Nick: Jags. I'm a sucker for that extra half point.

PATRIOTS (-9.5) vs Dolphins
Figgs: Pats. Remember when chad henne started for these guys? I think it's safe to say his career is over. (I realize this has nothing to do with this game, but I haven't gotten much michigan bashing in lately.)
Joe: Patriots; Brady and co. have home field in their sights, so I don't see them letting off the gas against a division rival.
Nick: Dophins. Just on principle. This should be a 6 or 7 point line, but it's bumped by Patriots' inflation.

BENGALS (-4) vs Cardinals
Figgs: Cards. Not a big fan of this pick, but Joe makes a solid arguement.
Joe: Cardinals; Not likely they sneak into the playoffs, but they are red hot right now and I just simply don't buy this Bengals team getting in.
Nick: Bengals. Joe, not sure why you have been so against the Bengals this year. They aren't flashy, but they have one of the league's best defense, the Red Rifle is competent, they have a decent running game, and AJ Green. ($)

BUFFALOES (+3) vs Broncos
Figgs: Broncos. By far my favorite game on the board. The Jackson-less Jills might be the worst team in the NFL. ($)
Joe: Broncos; Tebow lose two in a row? Blasphemy!
Nick: Donks. Can you teach me how to Tebow? ($ -2.5)

STEELERS (-12.5) vs Rams
Figgs: shitsburgh.
Joe: Steelers; To hell with waiting for the spread, the Rams pork. Even if Batch QB's and the offense is flat, they should still win something like 17-0, which would cover any spread they might throw out there.
Nick: Rams. Fuck these guys. Fuck em.

JETS (-3) vs Giants
Figgs: NYG. Right on with Joe. Basically a coin flip, I'll take Eli over the Sanchize.
Joe: Giants; Getting the standard "road" 3 points. But since they play 8 "home" games in this stadium, I might as well take the underdog since I can't seem to get a feel on either of these 2 underachievers.
Nick: Giants. The three is significant here, especially with the Sanchize under center.

REDSKINS (-6.5) vs Vikings
Figgs: Vikes. Peterson seems to be 100%, and it's still Rex Grossman. ($)
Joe: Redskins; Quietly, they have played really well lately, and while the Vikings probably wouldn't pick Luck, the kings ransom they could receive by trading that pick should be enough incentive to lose this one.
Nick: Vikes. The Skins aren't good enough to 6.5 to many teams, even at home.

PANTHERS (-7.5) vs Buccaneers
Figgs: Cats. I never expected to lay this many points for a 5-9 team, but the Bucs are just poop.
Joe: Panthers; Bucs are the most disappointing team this year in my opinion, and Cam has the Cats playing well and ready for a playoff run in the 2012 season. Mark it down!
Nick: Panthers. Boy, there hasn't been a more disappointing team than the Buccos this season.


Saturday, 4 pm kickoff

LIONS (-2.5) vs Chargers
Figgs: SD. The Chargers need this one more, as Detroit is going to get in the playoffs anyway, and Rivers does seem to save his best for this month.($)
Joe: Bolts; No one beats Phillip Rivers in December. NO ONE! Although Charger fans are surely in a Catch 22 because another win or two might actually save Norv Turners job...again.
Nick: Chargers. This is a tough one to pick. I guess I'll grab a couple of points.

COWBOYS (-1.5) vs Eagles
Figgs: Philly. It won't take as much of a miracle as you might think, Joe. Winning in Dallas won't be easy, but they obviously need this one and a W against the Skins next week, and it would just take a Jets win over the Giants this week then the G-men turning around and beating Dallas (at home) next week. Two very distinct possibilities.
Joe: Eagles; Now that they are healthy, they are living up to their hype. It's gonna be too late to make the playoffs (barring a miracle) but no too late to ruin Dallas' season.
Nick: Eagles. Because I'm rooting for the inevitable Dallas collapse.

SEAHAWKS (+2) vs 49ers
Figgs: Niners. I've been (successfully) rolling with the Hawks the past few weeks, but I'm back on the Niner bandwagon after last week.
Joe: Seahawks; They're really rolling lately and I could see a Monday night letdown coming from San Fran.
Nick: Niners. Under 3 points I still think the Niners present some value. They still need to take care of business to earn a bye.


Sunday Night Football

PACKERS (-13) vs Bears
Figgs: Pack. Love this being under two TD's. The Bears have been God awful and now Josh McCown is starting? Rodgers and the crew get back on track in a big way this week. ($)
Joe: Packers; They haven't clinched home field yet, so Rodgers and the boys should play. I figure even if SF loses on Saturday and GB does clinch, I would definately take Matt Flynn as my QB over Hanie/McCown, and GB has so many crazy good WR's that they can't possibly rest all of them.
Nick: Bears. The Packers have some serious issues with their offensive line and defense, and Chicago still has a solid D.


Monday Night Football

SAINTS (-7) vs Falcons
Figgs: ATL. I bet against my boys last week and it bit me on the ass. Hopefully they'll forgive me.
Joe: Saints; I love watching Drew Brees play football. If the ATL wants to clinch a playoff spot, they will have to do it next week.
Nick: Saints. I'm still convinced the Falcons secretly suck, and New Orleans has quietly won six straight.

Figgs' Teaser: Houston (+0.5)/Green Bay (-6.5)/Oakland (+9)