Hey, Mark Shapiro

So...are you going to do anything this winter? Oh, you're playing solitaire. No, no, don't worry, you don't need to minimize it.

I was just wondering if you're going to add something more than, you know, a utility infielder and an Oriental reliever with a funny name? Yeah, I know he has the same name as the hot dog guy. Sure, I see the marketing potential there. That's true, he didn't star in a gay porn like the other guy.

But seriously, no trades, no free agents, nothing like that?

That's cool, I just wanted you to level with me. Of course we're still friends.